this is me..... now.

2009-01-21T19:17:00.000-08:00

i want to blog..
but i don't.

so, i write this instead and win on both counts.

2008-11-23T19:57:00.001-08:00

tiny update:
i'm still alive-- although currently still without a computer. so yeah, nobody hate me. i just never get on anymore.
life is good. no, life is great. :)

tomorrow i leave for phoenix for the insane marshall family reunion. oh the good times and fun that are in store.

happy thanksgiving!

i was thinking yesterday when i was at work about how much i have to be thankful for.
my salvation and my relationship with Jesus.
my family.
my friends.
my nephew :)
my job.
my eyesight (poor as it is)

you get the idea. my life is overflowing with blessings. and i am thankful.

peace out

current thoughts on my mind

2008-11-04T08:18:00.001-08:00

yesterday marked my one month anniversary at work.

today is pharrells bday. happy birthday kris10!

today is election day. i voted by absentee last week so i feel not quite as involved as usual.

i saw something on the news this morning about how people were unable to vote this morning because a library employee overslept and didn't open at 6am sharp (when scheduled)-- my conspiracy theorist side of me started to take over and begin speculation of cheating.

also noteworthy, a city in missouri is offering free body piercings to people who vote. my thoughts? do what you have to in order to get people to vote. it shouldn't be necessary to bribe people, but in any case, we are expecting the largest voter turnout in history. so that is good.

i'm tired of the media and how they twist things.

fall on the east coast is beautiful. on sunday i walked from our condo to the town center (where i work) its about 2 miles and was the prettiest walk ever.

a guy from work came to church with my on sunday. his name is elo. i hope he will soon be a brother in christ.

since i moved here, i have been reading poetry and learning south and central american countries. yeah, somehow i never learned much of this in school.

my sister and brother-in-law went out to vote today and left me in charge of calvin. today is the first time that he hasn't cried when they left. in other words, he loves his auntie. :)

update:

2008-10-22T20:49:00.000-07:00

a. my computer is busted so i'm never online anymore. bah
b. i went to a show in dc at a bar. yep. deal with it. ha.
c. it was pretty fun (no, i did not drink)
d. guys are fun to work with.
e. its weird making friends
f. i am having a problem with the fact that Gap is just down the street from work.
g. i miss my friends.
h. i am so happy to be here
i. i love not knowing what tomorrow will hold
j. starbucks coffee sucks. its the truth. gross.
k. people here are rude. period.
l. i went in target tonight and searched for about 20 minutes for contact solution--it appeared that there is no eye care aisle at this particular store. preposterous? i thought so!
m. i wish my laptop worked.
n. i have fully embraced the awkwardness that i refer to as my life.
o. God is stretching me in ways i never imagined. comfort zone=gone.
p. okay bye!

starbucks

2008-10-09T21:18:00.000-07:00

yep, thats me alright.

i have no idea how people take pictures of themselves in mirrors. the camera kept blocking my face!
it took me forever to get the angles right. and obviously, it still needs some improvement. but anyway, yep, thats what i look like these days.
the hats actually pretty swell. i don't even have to do my hair! not like i ever did before... :)

2 week anniversary

2008-09-29T20:06:00.000-07:00

happy anniversary to me. today marked 14 days that i have been living on the east coast. it seemed like just another day until kris10 pointed out the significance of it. my how the time does fly.. and thanks krizz. :)

i've had a ton on my mind lately and am not feeling coherent enough to put together anything resembling an intelligent blog, so i'll just give a few highlights of my first weeks here.

-most recent, today (and probably most exciting).. i got a job! at a swanky starbucks in the heart of the reston town center. basically,, i'm pretty excited about this. most of the customers are decked out in suits and ties.. it will be quite an experience!

-i have navigated the confusing streets of reston somewhat successfully, all on my own! my favorite, absolute favorite thing about the roads here is the fact that street names just change into something else with NO warning. so you're cruising along, minding your own business, when BAM! suddenly you find yourself on an entirely different road (and in most cases, somehow all 3 lanes get channeled onto toll road, whether you want to go or not!) rant over.

-i am moved into my new room. i still need to get a bookcase and a few other small things, but i am totally amazed and blessed by how at home i feel here and how quickly that happened.

-also in my first two weeks here, i seemed to have succumbed to every illness known to man. or woman. from fever to vomiting, i had it all. the highlight was when damien (brother in law) threatening to force water down my throat so he wouldn't have to call the medics (his coworkers) to put an iv in me. i do understand the importance of staying hydrated. he, however, didn't seem to comprehend the fact that i was a bit wary to drink water when i was just throwing it up. anyway, too much info. moving on.

-i took calvin out to the playground the other day and decided that during those nightmare-ish 30 minutes, i am in no way ready to be a mother! in those few moments, he managed to eat dirt, fall down, nearly fall off the slide, nearly fall out of a swing, and get his pants soaked in some old water that was pooled in the slide. bah! meanwhile, i had bundled up since it looked so overcast outside, well, it proved to be about 110 with humidity factored in. basically, i was sweating up a storm and getting eaten by hundreds of mosquito's! bah! yeah, mosquitos are a big deal here!

-i have totally adapted to the fact that everything that i want/need is within 2 minutes time. it finally sank in today, that i will probably only have to fill up the gas tank about once every two months! basically, it was a good realization. :)

-there are tons of walking/running trails around. michelle and i went out the other day and it was just fun. once i have my work schedule i want to start finding times to go running. it is so pretty!

-there is a couple from "our" church who have a daughter who is about 6 months and they need somebody to watch her on thursday night. yep, i'm doing a bit of babysitting on the side. because,,, why not? ha! theres nothing here to stop me! so, that will be an experience i'm quite sure. i've never watched such a young child before.

well, i seem to have gotten a bit off the topic here.. oh well, basically, that is what i've been up to. life is good. God is faithful. :) things are coming together for me and i couldn't be happier about it.

follow up..

2008-09-26T13:45:00.000-07:00

well, i've heard back from 3 of 4. any of them would be fine besides the one inhabited by the bently look-a-like. pretty sure i'd have to turn that place down. i couldn't handle too much of that before i went absolutely mad!

just thought i'd keep everyone in the loop.

you're welcome :)

a day out.

2008-09-25T20:00:00.000-07:00

today was my first day out on my own. i realize that probably sounds a bit odd considering i've been here nearly 2 weeks. basically, those 2 weeks have been occupied by an assortment of wretched illnesses that struck one after another.
about a week ago, my sister michelle mentioned seeing that a starbucks "just down the road" (yeah, this would later come back to haunt me) was hiring. i, in my pre-sick state, jumped right online and printed off some applications. Since there are approximately 25,000 starbucks within a 10 mile radius, i thought to myself, i'll just pick the 4 closest ones and apply and see what happens.
well, that was over a week ago. so today, with a burst of energy and determination, i decide to take one of the cars and drop off my apps. due to michelles promptings, i steered away from my usual jeans and t-shirt wardrobe. i was pretty much decked out in real business clothes (yeah, i borrowed them from the sister :)-- i had on slacks, a button up dress shirt and some heels. i actually felt like i belonged in an office. this was sort of exciting for the first 2 minutes until i realized that i probably would hate an office job. secondly, the freshly ironed shirt was already proving to be a pain. wrinkles galore. bah! the main attraction to me was the sound my heels made on the asphalt when i walked.
so, without going into too many gory details, the locations were found (i only got lost once) and the apps were turned in. i would just like to share my personal favorite awkward moment that occurred at my second location..
i was standing, waited in line a couple of minutes, noting that the guy operating the cash register looked a bit like dierks bently (country singer for those who don't know).. anyway, so i get to the front and "dierks" is looking a bit frazzled. the following was our "conversation."
him: "hi"
me: "hi, i just wanted to turn an application"
him: stares.
me:... awkwardly handing it over.. the guy isn't moving!
me: .. "are you guys hiring at all right now"? still trying hand him those wretched papers!
him:.. "uhhhh. i don't know." he finally takes my application and stares at it like he's never seen one before!
me, totally dumbfounded.. silent.. trying to figure out how the heck this guy doesn't even know if they're hiring or not!
so, i finally decide to just end out little chat with "okay, well thanks for your time"
him: "wait! what was your name?!" (like its not on the stupid application!!)
me: "marianne" (ohhh, how i knew this was going to be butchered!!)
him: "marilyn?"
me: "marianne"
him: "marybeth?"
i was once again at a loss as to how to respond. i could keep shouting my name but that just seemed silly.. i was deciding how to respond when..
him: "oh, don't worry, its fine- i've got your paperwork right here. i'll just check."
bahaha! i walked out to my car and just started busting up laughing. there was nothing about that encounter that made any sense. good times.
so that was my day. on a more positive note, one of the girls that i talked to (at another location) was really nice and i discovered that she was also from washington state.

so, yes, that was my day. haha

2008-09-20T12:40:00.001-07:00

yeah, it somehow worked itself out.. haha

things i see everyday... from Reston Virginia.

2008-09-20T12:29:00.000-07:00

these were a garage sale purchase today. a buck a piece!! i was pretty happy. not totally sure what they are supposed to be used for, but i'm going to hang them on the wall and have some fun. :)

my room. i haven't done much decorating because i'm still waiting for my boxes!! more pics to come :)

me-- and my closet. 9-20-2008

this is the sight that greets me quite frequently in my new home. he is precious and i love being near the little tike.

......................alright. after several noble attempts at editing-- i cannot for the the life of me figure out how to get the "captions" above or below (or even near!!!) the picture being described. so yeah. have fun.

here I am, and here we go, life's waiting to begin.

2008-09-18T12:02:00.001-07:00

well, i flew over here sept 15th. i said goodbye to everyone i knew and hopped on a plane. armed with.. nothing. haha.
anyway, just for a recap on the last couple of days..

my flights were good-none of my customary sprinting to my gate almost missing my flight sort of happenings. no delays. smooth flights. pretty much perfection as far as traveling. the one mishap occurred in chicago when i was strolling around looking for some food. i had my purse and a large duffel bag that i had brought carry-on, so i was hauling those around when the should strap on the duffel bag just snapped. bam! the bag pretty much flew off my shoulder and somehow traveled about 3 feet before coming to a rest right on some mans foot. ugh. when will these things stop happening to me??!! so i pretty much had to carry that stupid bag by the small handles instead of the shoulder strap. it was not nearly as comfortable, let me tell you.

so yeah, that was that. i arrived here at my new home, Chesnut Grove Square. :) i like the name. its pretty nice and cozy. i'll have to post some pics after i get my room looking how i want it to. :) basically, theres a bed. a closet, and a chair set up by the window. that is where i am right now as i'm writing this. i have the window open and the wind is sort of just breezing through. i have quite a view as well. i'll need to be good about closing my shades so people can't see in here at night. i've never really had to worry about that kind of thing before-- so this will be a learning experience!

i'm pretty excited to just be near tons of stuff. theres an awesome running/walking/biking trail about 1/2 mile from where we're living. theres a starbucks less than a mile down the road that is currently hiring. yep, i might go pick up an app and see what happens.

the one downer i have to report is that i seem to have caught some kind of allergy-like illness. i haven't been feeling terribly great today. michelle has been taking wonderful care of me though. oatmeal for breakfast, soup and toast and tea for lunch :) its my first time being "sick" away from home. but all in all, i don't miss home at all so far. i've had random moments of missing certian people and things, but i'm pretty excited about how easily i have adjusted.

last thought: michelle had her ultrasound yesterday, and for those of you who haven't heard yet, they're having a girl! we are all pretty excited. my sister-sense had predicted it would be a girl, but we are all very excited that its been confirmed!

alrighty, over and out.

btw, i cannot seem to stop listening to angels and airwaves. i pretty much listened to them on my ipod the whole way over here.

my mom...

2008-09-12T22:19:00.001-07:00

my life is so full of goodbyes right now. i know that it is to make room for that many hello's. its become pretty evident to me that i have amazing friends. i'm sure that i'll miss them, but i know for a fact that it won't really matter if i don't see them for 3 months. when i come home in december they'll still be my friends. :) i thank the Lord every time i think of them..

noteworthy today:
my mom was talking to me about her day today--how work was and so on and so forth. anyway, she mentioned that one of her coworkers asked her if she was feeling okay and that she seemed a little quiet today.
my mom responds something along the lines of "i'm just quieter because i'm a little sad. marianne is leaving on monday and i'm going to miss her."
somewhere in my cluttered and overstimulated mind, i had come to the conclusion that, my parents had already dealt with so many kids moving away, that i was simply another one. it didn't really hit me until mom told me that story that she actually would miss me.
i decided in that moment that i have a pretty sweet mom. :)

2008-09-08T00:27:00.000-07:00

i haven't set my alarm clock in days.

i like this feeling. a lot. :)

pretty much

2008-09-05T06:59:00.000-07:00

i am working my final day at the shop today.
i have my ticket, i'm flying out sept 15th.

i am sooo excited!!!!!!

going to seattle

2008-08-29T12:09:00.001-07:00

pretty much happy about the reunion of roadtrippin pals this weekend.

good times in store for sure.

2008-08-28T21:38:00.001-07:00

life just kind of caught up with me today. alot of things i haven't been thinking about/haven't had time to process just sort of chose today to get my attention.
i found out i have a little car repair situation i didn't really plan for (just some silly something about the muffler, no biggie), right.
it sort of hit me that i probably ought to start looking at flights so i can get the heck out of here. no offense intended to all beloved friends i leave behind. but i must go. i must leave this place. i've got somewhere to go i've got a new road to follow,,blah blah.. anyway, it seems that no airline on the face of the planet offers $99 one ways anymore. bah! i'm not spending $450 for a ONE WAY NON STOP FLIGHT!

so yeah, didn't see this day coming at all. i felt for the most part that i was just an empty human shell walking around with the life sucked right out of me. i suppose it was just about time that the chaos of what i'm currently calling my life has caught up with me.

tomorrows another day.

just stuff

2008-08-26T20:48:00.000-07:00

today felt like october. its like summer just sort of ended without anyones permission and we have been flung into fall. i spied some leaves that had aleady changed colors today.
i was then hit by a strange thought:
i am never again going to watch the seasons pass here.
i am never again going to have a daily commute from lilliwaup to shelton.
this place will soon be a memory, a place i am going to come for summer vacations, holidays and reunions with old friends.
in a few short weeks i am going to pack my bags (boxes, whatev) and leave.

i am no longer going to see my friends on a daily basis.
i am not going to have friends! ha! its been a long time since i've had to "make" a friend.

i sense i am going to be stretched in so many ways. i can't wait for what the Lord has in store for me. more so than ever i am feeling peace about this decision.
quite frankly, i still don't really have much of a grasp on what i want to do for the rest of my life, but i know this move is the right thing to do. stay posted. :)

2008-08-18T21:18:00.000-07:00

a few things on my mind.

-i'm moving
-i love michael phelps
-i got my cartilage pieced.
-i have been very impatient lately and am sorry for it.
-i'm so happy for a fresh start.
-i'm not sure if i want time to go by fast, slow, or simply stop.
-the sermon sunday was amazing and i was both challenged and convicted by it
-i have not been consistent in my devotions this summer.
-china is totally cheating in the olympics and everyone seems fine with it.
-half of the chinese gymnasts are like 12 and no one seems to care.
-did i mention i am going to marry michael phelps?
-when i'm living in virginia i'll be very close to his hometown (baltimore)
-how are Jamaicans so flippin' fast??!!
-i can't wait to see the world.
-i got my last cavities filled last week so my mouth is very happy. :)
-i want to order michael phelps: greatest Olympic champion.. but i can't quite justify spending the money on it. maybe after my next paycheck ;)

thats about it. for anyone who actually stumbled through this random list of nonsense!

i think that coming home and watching the Olympics

2008-08-11T20:12:00.000-07:00

is the best way to finish off a crappy day.
i love michael phelps.. luke walton might have to watch his back..

my life

2008-08-10T17:21:00.000-07:00

well, things are getting pretty official. i told my parents about my last day at urraco (sept. 5th). i was kind of expecting something in the way of lectures about how i shouldn't quit the only job i have without anything else lined up kind of scenerio, but they both surprised me with calmness.

mom suggested/supported the idea of me going to live with liisa and nate (phoenix) for a couple of months until michelle and damien get a house in virginia. i'm contemplating with the idea. i love that i have family everywhere and could just bop down and move in with any of them. i have never felt so blessed by my siblings as i do in this moment.

i want to take a roadtrip in september and go to ventura and/or phoenix. i have a lot of big life decisions to make and i feel that the only way that i can make them is if i get away by myself. i'm quite sure that i'll have my life figured out by the time i get back. something about just me and the open road sounds delicious. :) we shall see... i'm hoping and praying that i'll have the opportunity to take that trip sometime in september. haha, its not like getting time off from work will be a problem!!

anyway, yep, thats my life right now. a couple more weeks of working at urraco, walking with the bexler, late nights chatting with mel, beating mike at basketball, hanging out in our currently couch-less living room and chatting with the parents... life is about to change and i couldn't be any more ready for it. :)

just another day

2008-08-07T20:57:00.000-07:00

i hate merging.
actually, let me rephrase: i hate that no one else on this planet seems to understand the concept. yes, i had a bad experience today involving a humongous truck hauling a boat trying to run me off the road.

also noteworthy today, i was in the dreaded walmart (two days in a row now!!) buying some random things for my mom and i decided to pick up an el cheapo pair of sunglasses, as i seem to have left mine in seattle... anyway, so i'm trying on one of the five choices (has anyone else noticed a lack of selection there??!!) when this guy walks by and tosses a "they'll look a whole lot better without the price tag" my way. right. thanks dude.

highlight of my day was definitely spilling a caramel macchiato on floor. stickiness abounding! woof.
yeah, that was my day.
i do not deserve all the amazing friends God has blessed me with.

i love

2008-08-05T20:01:00.000-07:00

i love the smell of the water when i drive alongside of it every day.
i love the smell of the freshly cut grass.
i love how it's approximately 10 degrees cooler once i hit the bottom of purdy canyon.

i love that my sister and my nephew are coming to visit in just a couple of weeks.
i love laughing with friends.
i love friends.

i love that life is changing. and its changing fast. come next month, almost everything in my life will be different.
i love long distance friendships that just pick back up when you see each other.

2008-08-01T21:26:00.003-07:00

i just made a batch of chocolate chip cookies that can only be described in one word:

perfection.

house-sitting

2008-07-03T16:09:00.000-07:00

i love house-sitting!!! mel and i have been staying at a family friends house for the past week and we absolutely love it! i've been walking to work everyday (2 miles roundtrip) which is just a thrill for me as i live out in the boondocks.
some of my favorite things so far.

-buying my own food. (we eat way more cheese than i thought possible!)
-not having to put gas in my car.
-taking evening strolls around the neighborhood
-approximately 25,000 channels
-having friends over
-having mom come over for lunch
-luke (cute little dog that cuddles during the night)
-just general goodness in the fact that we can just run to walmart or fred myer and be back within 10 minutes.

so much to say...

2008-07-03T06:13:00.001-07:00

yet no desire to say it on here.
meanwhile, i'm still here. i'm still breathing.
life in july looks a bit calmer than life in june.
i actually am excited about the fact that i don't have any travel plans in the month of july. i have just been on the go for the whole month (well, the better part of the year somehow) and i'm currently excited about the prospect of a decent size paycheck!!

the big one

2008-06-04T22:07:00.001-07:00

do or die time.

"the hike" is on saturday. THIS saturday. 20 miles. pray for sun.

i'm pretty much excited!!!!

i am ironman

2008-05-31T19:59:00.000-07:00

mel and i decided tonight that at some point before we die, we are going to go to ireland and sip beer at a pub. thats right. the marshall sisters are gonna reach for their roots!!!

hmmm

2008-05-31T19:08:00.000-07:00

apparently i haven't felt much of a desire to blog as of late. actually, that is a lie. however, i feel that most things i actually want to say, i will not say on here. pretty much defeats the purpose of the idea of the blog.. anyway.

-lakers are in the finals vs the celtics!!! go la!!
-why is manu ginobli still a bench player? seriously, the guy averages more minutes off the bench than almost all of the starters, save duncan and parker. i say he comes off the bench with the single intent of capturing the "sixth man" award every year.
-ironman is such a good movie! if you haven't seen it, do it!!
-indiana jones is not a good movie. if you haven't seen it, don't!
-mel and i went to a jewish synagogue today.. random. possibly more details to follow.
-i have some sweeeeeeet running shoes (asics) and i love them!! they have turned me into a pro-fo runner! kind of..
-i am now the proud owner of a beautiful ipod named ovile. (thanks leah) :)
-summer is nearly here and i'm so happy about it.

that should be enough for now.
i'm still here.
i'm still breathing.

noted.

2008-04-30T19:51:00.000-07:00

an elderly (60+ish) man come into the shop this evening and i greeted him with a customary smile and a "hi." i, however, was not prepared when he replied with "i wish i was high."
first thought: this man has got to be kidding. does he really wish that he was on drugs? and if so, why tell me? weirdness all around. but me, being the new and improved me, stayed calm, cool and collected and deduced that he must have meant "high" as in height, as he was a vertically challenged man.

so yes, totally threw me off but i recovered quickly and even ventured to find out why his mood was so merry, turns out that he is retiring in 2 days. part of me just let myself get carried away with my thoughts and wondered what it would be like when i retire. my mind has just been toying around with lots of random scenarios lately. such as, where i'll live, what i want to do, etc... for a moment i just let myself fast forward in time about 40 years and try to imagine the elation that man was feeling. 2 more days of the same old mundane get up, go to work, go to lunch, get off, go home, watch the news, go to bed and do it all again the next day slash living for the weekends and holidays so you can actually do something you enjoy type of livivng.

i don't know if this makes sense.. i just couldn't quite get it out of my head. so, yep, a look inside my head. lucky!

one is silver and the other gold..

2008-04-24T20:36:00.000-07:00

yay for old friends moving back into town from california!!
pretty much the best news that i could have gotten on this otherwise crap-filled mundane day that was getting exponentially worse with every moment that me and becky ranted and raved to each other about anything that happened to stumble through our despondent and funk filled minds. pretty much the two of us should not be allowed to speak when we are in these moods. no good can come from it. well, actually, i think i was starting the long climb out of funktown even before i got the exciting call from the soon to be olmpia resident.

shana just might be the beacon of hope that lifted me out of the horrid funk i found myself in today.

you can't get nowhere without no education

2008-04-22T18:44:00.000-07:00

this is something that has bothered me for quite some time, and some comments as of late have brought all the ill feelings rising back to the surface.
i'm so tired of people lecturing me to go back school. first off, these are people that DO NOT KNOW ME. they have no idea what i want to do in my life. they are not aware of the fact that i have actually "decided" several times what i want to do school/career wise and then backed out because i can not see myself doing it for the rest of my life. this is not a decision that i intend to make lightly. they don't know this because they don't know me.
they don't know that i DO want to go back to school-i simply am not sure what i want to study yet.
i've never understood how high school kids just jet off to universities and seem to know what they want to major in, and essentially, what the rest of their entire lives looks like. kudos to them, i don't mean to diss those who actually have a clue what they want to do. not everyone knows so early on in life and i don't even want to touch on the fact that many of them end up changing their majors and/or hating what they do.
so, having said that, i have been taking my time and praying about where the lord will lead me. ultimately it isn't even up to me so i don't want to stress over it.
this is not directed to close friends and people who actually know me. in which case, fire away. i may not even be able to give you the answers that you want since i don't know them myself, but feel free to ask me. but if you don't know me, you don't have any right to lecture me about going back to school. what if i couldn't afford to go back to school? what if i was forced to stay home and take care of a dying parent. i'm not, thank goodness, but really, these people don't know me. they have no idea what my life looks like. therefore, they have no right to lecture me and guilt trip me and walk away thinking to themselves, "i'm glad i said something. she just needs some motivation." just stop. you're not helping me. you're forcing me to put on a smile and nod through your annoying speech that i've endured hundreds of times before.
i'm just sick of this random wave of parent-ish people demanding to know what my plans are, and gasp, oh the horror that i'm not going to school right now. "just make sure you go back." "college opens up a lot more opportunities" they say. no way, really? dang, i was just planning on working at the shop for the rest of my entire life. i guess i'll have to do a little reevaluating.
i know this sounds pretty bitter, i'm probably not as upset as this implies. it obviously is something that bothers me though, and a comment at work today by a customer just got me fired up about it.

bejeweled..

2008-04-09T20:37:00.000-07:00

i can't lie. i am totally obsessed with this game. its been a little while since i let myself get obsessed with something. sometimes i actually frighten myself with my inabilty to focus on/and or tune everything else out except my current interest/obsession. example:
i stayed over two hours after i got off work tonight just to play bejeweled, (i got to level 62!!) but my point is that i have no self control in some areas of my life.
this seems to be a family trait. mel and i decided long ago that we would never go gambling. we would not stop. for some reason we just have very little restraint in certain areas of life.
at this point in my life i choose not to drink alcohol. not that i think there is anything wrong with drinking in moderation, be my guest, but to be completely honest, i am somewhat afraid that if i liked what i was drinking, i'd simply keep doing it.
i haven't really even figured this out myself, it was just a reinforced thought today that i pondered much of the drive home tonight.
well, back to my game i go!!

i'm a blonde.

2008-04-01T20:02:00.000-07:00

is so stinkin' tired of buying the wrong things!!
i am a chronic "accidently buy the conditioner instead of the shampoo" kind of girl and i never noticed until after i'm out of the store. i thought i had put all this behind me as it hasn't happened in for quite some time. thought maybe at the ripe ol age of 23 i finally outgrew this scatter-brained quirk.
nope.
i intended to buy my dad a gift card for cabelas from fred myer. instead he is getting a gift card to some random and obscure fishing and tackle store that i have never even heard of. because apparently i thought it said "cabelas" on it. bah!!
happy birthday dad.
love your sometimes idiotic daughter.

you give it all

2008-03-29T21:53:00.000-07:00

i am still currently obsessed with "with or without you"

i am still currently tired of people trying to set me up and marry me off. just stop.

i love naked juice. i wish it wasn't so expensive.

i am going to seattle with my fam on tuesday for my dads birthday. i'm oddly excited.

i wish i had a cell phone that wasn't broken.

i am in denial of the fact that there has been snow in march. just stop.

i have decided that clothes/wallets/purses/shoes/everything is pretty much geared towards "juniors" aka 16 year old teeny-boppers who wear like size 0 and love hollister clothes, or on the other side of the spectrum, frumpy old ladies who wear cardigans with matching colored shirts sewn in to it and slacks with those little pleats near the pockets.. you know the kind. frumpy. this is something that i have been aware of for some time, but it seems to have gotten considerably worse over the past year or so. what ever happened to classy clothes that are just nice and never go out of style??

i have decided that talking on cell phones while driving should NOT be illegal. for one thing, thats the only time that i can talk on my phone. i don't get service at my house. i don't talk on it at work. so, pretty much, that leaves my time in the car. i have no intention of stopping either. i think that the real crime is the idiotic places where people pull off the road (or in some cases, not off the road). i have seen so many cars just frantically veering off, and/or stopping without getting compltely off the road. i'd rather take my chances and worry about them being on the phone as opposed to hanging in the road.

i have been wondering for the past few weeks how many times you can refuse to tell someone your name without being rude. this happened at work and i just wasn't sure. i dodged the question effectively once. the 2nd time was getting sticky. finally, on the 3rd time, i had to give in. i was just curious (roy).

um, i think thats it.

i'm back!

2008-03-26T20:21:00.001-07:00

i visited my sister and brother in law in virginia. it was amazing. i love it there. quite frankly, there are so many things i could blog about. in particular, there was a very awkward moment on one of my flights. i don't quite have the energy or desire to have the whole world laughing at me. but for those who have heard it-awkward!
anyway, so i'm back in town. its always weird for me to come back after one of my random flittings off somewhere. i can't even explain it. just some strange feeling aways comes over me. my first day at work is always the worst. just trying to adjust back into the swing of things. you know.
yeah, so of all things, i have been completely obsessed with the u-2 song "with or without you".. i've listened to it pretty much nonstop for 2 days now.

See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you

Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you

With or without you
With or without you

Through the storm we reach the shore
You give it all but I want more
And Im waiting for you

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

My hands are tied
My body bruised, shes got me with
Nothing to win and
Nothing left to lose

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you
With or without you

2008-03-17T20:01:00.000-07:00

i'm leaving on a jet plane. i dont know when i'll be back again. (okay, i do, i'll be back the 25th. or 24th? geez, i can never remember).

ta ta!!
little calvin here i come!!!

welcome to the 90's mr. banks

2008-03-08T18:09:00.001-08:00

well, i avoided it for as long as i could. i'm not sure why but i just didn't want to get sucked into this for some reason. the long fought battle is over- and i lost.
i started an ebay account and a pay pal account. yep.

on the other hand, i got an amazing deal on some books that i've been eying and scouting for at bookstores for years. and i got a better deal! and, i'm not going to lie, there is a certain triumph that comes with "winning" an item!

oh no

2008-03-02T20:09:00.000-08:00

so the bro and i were "home alone" tonight and just bopping around and spending some quality time together and we decided to make some chocolate chip cookies. now, i'm not gonna lie, i am not much of a cook/baker/anything that has anything to do with anything in the kitchen. however, after a few recent batches of cookies, a few mornings of scrambled eggs, and a successful tuna sandwich, i was starting to feel like i'd gotten a handle on this whole cooking thing.
well, my streak of good fortune in the kitchen has officially ended. the two main catastrophes can be summed up as:
..mike only adding 1/4 of a teaspoon of baking soda instead of a whole teaspoon
.. me somehow (i'm not actually sure how this happened!!) putting the cookies on the cookie sheet upside down! :( i mean, in all fairness, both sides are flat. it happens.

so, yeah, no cookies tonight. we instead feasted on some smarties over a few episodes of alias.

people are needy beings.

2008-03-02T00:33:00.000-08:00

so, theres this lady who comes into the shop. well, drives through mostly. she's a nice lady and i don't have any problem with her or her high maintenance drink. she gets a
16 oz iced vanilla latte with half the flavor, with 1% milk, (which we don't have so we just mix 2% and nonfat) and with just light ice.
now, yeah, just a little high maintenance but people are funny and they have their quirks. i think she likes to feel special and pampered and thats why she does it. anyway, so, the past couple of times i've made it for her she has handed it back and asked very nicely if i could add more 2% milk to it. now, having started to notice this trend, every time i've made it recenty, i add less and less nonfat and more and more 2% since that seems to be what she likes even though she won't admit it.
which brings us to today....
i see her pull up. make her drink using ONLY 2% MILK! NO NONFAT. anyway, leah brings it over, hands it to the woman. she tries a sip....
wait for it...
wait for it..
yep! not enough 2% she asked if i could add more to it!!!!!!! my theory was proven. i suspected this for a while now but had no proof. unbelievable!
also, just for the record i feel that i should be up front about the fact that i do not make a habit of tampering with customers drinks. this was a rare case.
and there ya go.

the highway man

2008-02-26T20:05:00.001-08:00

during my 5 am drive into work this morning, i noticed that the moon was just amazingly beautiful. my early morning muddled mind then proceeded to recite what i could remember of "the highway man." i'm not gonna lie, my knowledge was limited to "watch for me by moonlight, wait for me by moonlight. i'll come to thee by moonlight, though hell should bar the way!" i think i might try to start every morning with a little burst of poetry. why not?
after work i went to the library and picked up a form i need for my taxes. then i decided to go for a walk since it was such a nice day. i walked pretty much all over town and enjoyed myself immensely. It might become a habit :) sometimes i worry myself at how effortlessly i can amuse/entertain myself. i think i just really enjoy being alone with my thoughts. and lets face it, getting lost in your thoughts with the sun beating down is just about the best thing that could happen.
when i got home, i once again took advantage of the fine day we had and decided to clean out my very neglected car. it was very successful and mel has never looked better!
in my cleaning frenzy i found the following items in my car-
-my glasses case
-my alarm clock
-my ring from israel that i thought i had lost. i was sooo happy to find it!!
-6 dollars worth of change just randomly hanging out in random areas.
-more urraco cups than i could even count! man those things accumulate fast!

but yeah, it was just a triumphant day all around. i also beat mike at HORSE 3 times. just my kinda day! :)

notable.

2008-02-22T11:33:00.000-08:00

fyi, this is not a rant about gas prices..
i just want to say that during the past week i have been keeping an eye on one of the gas stations i pass several times a day. i like to watch the prices change. let me rephrase, i like to watch the prices drop.
anyway, so earlier this week i got a little excited when i saw 3.05 for regular gasoline.. i convinced myself that i didn't need gas yet and i didn't really have time to stop. that was on my way to work.. on the way back, i decided i may as well stop and refuel, as 3.05 was the cheapest i'd seen it at that particular station for quite some time.
so, fast forward approximately 8 hours and i'm ready to pull into the station and i note the price had gone up to 3.15!! ohhh i was ticked off. i just felt like i personally had been ripped off. so, as an act of rebellion, i didn't stop. i just went on my merry way.
so when i drove by yesterday, on pretty much an empty tank, running on willpower and fumes alone, i glance over and see its gone up to 3.29!! grrrr!! why hadn't i gotten it when it was 3.05.
as i write this, i have a car out in the driveway that is borderline out of fuel because i was upset and the increase over a matter of a few hours!
now, its a personal pet peeve of mine to hear people complaining about gas prices. i mean, the joke is, every single person who owns a car/drives anywhere, would pay anything that was charged. i mean, i would pay 50.00 a gallon if i had to. i mean, what else can ya do?
i will lend an ear to a few complaints, if, and only if, you live out of town and actually feel the crunch of the prices. i don't have a drop of sympathy for people who live in shelton and just cruise around town everyday. filling up your tank once every 2 or 3 weeks in not a big deal! take this from someone who knows! i drive a minimum of 40 miles every single day. sometimes more. and i (in most cases) chose to simply not let myself get fired up about gas prices. there isn't anything i can do, so why bother?
so yeah, advice of the day. if you see a reasonably good deal, don't hesitate.
also, unless you've earned the right to complain about the prices. just stop.

ahh summer sun.

2008-02-19T18:28:00.000-08:00

oh how i have loved the sun the past couple of days. i've broken out the flip flops, busted open my sunroof, and most importantly, pulled out mine and mels "summer mix" and blasted it at full capacity.
life is good.
crusin' to those tunes with the sun warm on my face is pretty much the best thing ever.

bathroom humor

2008-02-13T21:51:00.001-08:00

highlight of my day.
i went to the mall tonight to do some birthday shopping for a certain friend. :) anyway, so i'm in the restroom and the woman in the stall a couple down is singing (loudly!) "we are the champions!" pretty much one of the funniest things i've ever experienced. i rushed in and out so i could laugh it up once i was safely out of earshot.
and please understand, she was not humming. or even singing quietly, she was singing very loudly. and it was the kind of singing when you know that they think that they sound good because of the acoustics of the bathroom. made it even funnier. :)
yeah, a beautiful moment in my life. :)
no time for losing because we are the champions.. of the world!

blinded by the light.

2008-02-12T06:10:00.000-08:00

its too early to put together a sting of coherent sentences.. i have just a few things on my mind.
1. i think permanent damage was done to my already blind-as-a-bat eyes this morning when i turned on the light at work this morning. geez, talk about spotlight status.
2. ever since i was driving home from olympia last night, i have seen more cars with burned out headlights then i have ever seen in all my life combined. it prompted me to drive by some glass doors so i could inspect the current status of my own. they were intact. but really? so many all at one time? its like auto parts storees have been suffering the jan-feb lull in business so they went out and destroyed everyones headlights just to cough up some business.
3. i am totally baffled by the way that customers are completely content carrying on a conversation despite the fact that the pastry case is entirely blocking both persons involved in the conversation. call me old fashioned but i like to be able to see the person that i'm talking to.
4. it seems that every monday night i have a sudden urgency to clean/organize my entire room. and do laundry and vacuum. this desire usually hits at about 10:00pm. its like my body knows that monday night is the one night i actually need to go to bed early in order to get up at 4:30. let me just say that i have a very clean room but very tired body this morning..
5. i swear the refrigerator at work has changed.. the handle is on the opposite side this morning.. and it opens the wrong way.. am i losing my mind??
6. for the past 2 weeks, maybe even 3 weeks i have turned into a list fiend. i make lists for everything. things i need, things i want, things i need to accomplish, it has changed my life. seriously, i have never been a very organized person (i blame it on the legendary family genes..) but these lists have revolutionized my life.
7. god is so good. sometimes i forget. i have been more diligent about getting in the word the past couple weeks and it always amazes me what a difference it makes in my life. everything is so much simpler, so much easier, so much calmer. god is the only thing that matters in this life. how is it possible that he is the one thing that i find myself neglecting? his mercies are new every morning.. :)
8. i enjoy early mornings like such as this one. quiet time to just sit.. think.. be. it's good for me.

2008-02-09T21:40:00.000-08:00

in the midst of the rant below, i forgot to mention a tidbit of good news. i went to the christian bookstore and got pilgrims progress for 5 bucks! i somehow have never read it all the way through so i'm excited.
i also picked up "the case for a creator." pretty excited about that one too. good books for a good deal make me happy. :)
alrighty. thats all for now!

cabelas, jerks and idiots.

2008-02-09T20:06:00.000-08:00

if you've been putting off going to cabelas because you're afraid it's still crazy busy, you are right. nightmare city in there! i guess going on a saturday wasn't the wisest choice but even so. people everywhere loaded down with shopping carts and walking around aiming guns.. i'm assuming they weren't loaded but still.. my brother and i almost got run over a couple of times by frantic shoppers. and don't even think about going into that little aquarium area. ugh! parents taking pictures of little kids like they've never seen fish before! just go to a real aquarium already if you want to admire wildlife!!
also, who knew that place was going to be so far from the freeway. i mean, you can see it from the freeway so it should be close, right? well, it kinda was and it kinda wasn't. lets just say i'm a little bit directionally impaired as it is and add that to the fact that we had to drive through approximately 10,000 little round-abouts (who invented those wretched things??!!) before we found cabelas.
the day can pretty much be summed up in the search for cabelas and the stupid self checkout area in the walmart in hawks prarie. so, you hear "self-checkout" and you think quick, right? just a few items and you're in and out. well, thats what i used to think. not anymore. we stood in line with 4 items for about 20 minutes! everyone in front of us had thousands of items in their carts, including produce and other miscellaneous items that take hours to ring up. grrrrr!! GO TO A REAL CASHIER IF YOU HAVE A WHOLE CART OF CRAP!! seriously, they can do it faster than you can. be a good citizen and leave the self checkout to people with just a few items. it would make the world go around much more happily.
also, please do not invade the "bubble" of fellow shoppers standing in line around you. i don't care if it's crowded and the line stretches back 10 miles, there is no need to keep bumping the person ahead of you with your loaded down cart. it makes the shopper in front of you (me in this particular case!) very unhappy. it also makes me wonder if you are trying to cut in front of me in line when you keep edging up. just stop. just wait like the rest of us and don't you dare ask me which self-checkout register i'm in line for! its simple; you stand in line and go to the first one that opens up. you don't necessarily wait for a particular one. thats not how it works. just chill out and wait your turn.
one more thing not to do. do not teeter along side highway 101 near hoodsport at night. in the rain. 2 inches from the white line. just don't do it. i am a pretty decent driver when it comes to reaction time and avoiding hitting things (people in this case) but seriously, do you want to die? of all dumb places to walk!! theres about 6 inches of clearance, if that! if you, stupid walkers, had been 2 inches closer, i probably would have hit you. and that is just a scary thought.

a nickels worth of free advice

2008-02-05T21:16:00.000-08:00

i guess it was free advice day at urraco today. first, in the wee hours of the morning, crazy bike man came in and we had a very lengthy chat about everything from politics to his ex girlfriend in florida. he seemed very intent on hearing my opinion about the idea that if you guard your heart and never let anyone too close, you won't get hurt. but at the same time, that can be hurtful as well. he was asking me what i thought the balance was. this conversation somehow originated from a simon and garfunkel song he had stuck in his head. he also proceeded to sing the song to me to try to jog my memory. pretty much hilarious!
also, later the very same day, roy was warning me about guys that say "i love you" but only want you to sleep with them. then they disappear into the night as soon as the girl becomes pregnant. i'm sorry, i could barely hold back the laughter. i mean, me?? i tried to tell him he didn't have to worry about me and thats not what i was all about but he was so concerned he wouldn't let me get a word in edgewise! it was so funny! they were both so fatherly and concerned. i was deeply touched by both of their random advice sessions.
i can only wonder what tomorrow will bring.

beautiful quote

2008-02-03T22:26:00.000-08:00

Do you ever feel you become the worst version of yourself? That a Pandora's Box of all the secret hateful parts -- your arrogance, your spite, your condescension -- has sprung open. Someone provokes you, and instead of just smiling and moving on, you zing them. Hello, it's Mr. Nasty.

I just felt the need to post this.
....You probably have no idea what I'm talking about...

2008-01-28T21:27:00.000-08:00

the smell/thought/sight of food no longer makes me want to vomit.
this is good.

its been a long time coming..

2008-01-26T10:20:00.000-08:00

yeah, i finally succumbed to the wretched flu virus that had been hounding me for weeks. i started feeling exhausted after i got home from work last night but i somehow didn't think much of it.
after sleeping in teasing little snatches last night due to some of the worst chills i've ever had, i wanted to die. well, things would get worse. lets just say this is some very unpleasant stomach flu. :(
ugh. well, i didn't post this for sympathy. i had made tentative plans for my day today but they will not be happening.

just a few things on my mind today

2008-01-25T21:14:00.001-08:00

-i never realize how old my toothbrush in until i get a new one. then i vow to never go so long again before replacing it. of course, i forget the vow just as soon as i make it.
-everyone is having or recently had a baby. they are everywhere!
-how in the heck are there still random heaps of snow loitering around? i mean, it snowed weeks ago!!
-why do i always end up buying a whole basket full of stuff when i wander into walmart only needing one thing??
-four times today i tried to adjust my glasses before i realized i wasn't wearing my glasses!
-i stopped in hoodsport on my way home to get gas and for some reason was deeply touched by the closeness of our community. there is nothing better than standing in line and listening to the small town talk swirling around me. someone is always insisting on buying a neighbor a hot coffee as the rest of the store is chatting it up about the recent road closures or construction taking place.
-i love people watching.
-goodbye heath ledger. you will be missed...

also noteworthy, i bought "roman holiday" at walmart tonight for 5 bucks!!

yeah, uh huh

2008-01-24T23:00:00.000-08:00

when talking on the phone, or sometimes face-to-face with someone, i find myself quite often saying "yeah" and "uh huh" or maybe an occasional nod or something thrown in as a way of affirming that i am listening and understanding what they're saying.
i am not a fan of those filler words but i have reached the conclusion that there is nothing else to say! the obvious would be to substitute "yes" for the dreaded "yeah" however, try to casually fling "yes" in the middle of someones story and it just throws everything off. its formal, frumpy and seems to be trying way too hard to be professional.
i would love nothing more than to halt my usage of the yeahing and uhhuhhings, but i'm not even sure its a possibility. i think theres a reason that everyone else has embraced these overused cliche' words too; its because there is nothing else to say in place of them!
if anyone has any thoughts, ideas, recommendations on additional words that could be used instead, please let me know!

just.. why?

2008-01-16T22:48:00.000-08:00

why do i always pick the wrong line when i go to the store? it never fails.
why do i have have road rage? i'm a somewhat mellow and even-tempered person for the most part. this rage just comes out every single time i follow someone slow (every day of my life!!!)
why would i rather spend 150.00 on a lakers ticket instead of getting my car fixed?
why do i always stay up so late?
why do guys honk, yell and check you out from their cars? seriously?? WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT???!!! just stop. it ticks me off.
why do i squander my time?
why do i flip through channel after endless channel on tv instead of doing something that actually matters?
why don't i care more?
why don't i love more?
why don't i serve more?
why am i sometimes just a jerk of a friend?
and why am i ok with that?
why am i posting this?
no clue. just wanted to throw it out there.

just call me mrs. walton

2008-01-15T06:30:00.000-08:00

ok. i can't even begin to explain how amazingly fun the lakers/sonics game was so i'm not even really going to try. lets just say, if you care a hoot about anything, you would have loved it. talk about a thrilling nail biter!
anyway, the lakers won in ot (overtime beck in case you don't know... :) i was pretty much in heaven.
annnnd luke walton is possibly my favorite laker. we got to the game early so we sat down COURTSIDE!! we got to watch them warming up.. ahhh. i'm not typically a big drooler over the opposite sex, but this was a much deserved occasion. so yeah, i'm pretty sure that, had we spoken, he would have felt the same connection.
thought:
if i married someone 6'8... the future walton kids would be like.. 10 feet tall with a wingspan that would encompass pretty much the entire u.s.

weekends are my friend

2008-01-11T22:36:00.000-08:00

some of my most recent realizations..
-i love 3 day weekends. so relaxing.
-every time my favorite team wins i am in a good mood.
-i don't even miss chocolate anymore
-battleship is a fun game that i can't believe i've missed my whole life.
-my car is out to get me. first 4 new tires. now 200 dollars for a heater. i guess driving a classy car has a price tag.
-i won't feel guilty for being selfish with my time. mel is here for a short time and i want to see her all i can.
-the free tickets to the lakers game are one of the sweetest things that anyone has ever done. thanks kevin :)
-i'm so tired of people trying to marry me off. theres been a random burst of it lately. just stop.
-everytime i look down at my hands i am amazed at how nice my nails look.
-i really need to go shopping but keep putting it off. the longer i wait though, the more stuff i have to get. bah, what a vicious circle!

"boom goes the dynamite"

2008-01-04T20:27:00.000-08:00

funniest video ever!
my highlights:
22 seconds "oh no"
the exasperated sigh around 47 seconds
the "i'm so sorry" that he whispers around 1:20
pretty much the whole pacers/knicks highlights are hilarious!! "passes it to the man", "reggie millers lookin good"

just a bit of randomness

2008-01-03T21:30:00.001-08:00

i don't believe in new years resolutions. long story and another blog, however, i am going to be giving up chocolate for an undetermined length of time. just because i can.
also, a few random thoughts that have been slow to leave my mind this past week or so.
1. a few months ago, maybe close to a year ago (i'm bad with dates) i got this really fun spinning ring from seattle. i wore it and played with it constantly for months. anyway, i recently lost the ring and was somewhat upset. it wasn't that expensive but i liked it and was rather sad. so my finger was just looking rather naked for a while. then my sister mel (who just returned to the states after a semester in Israel) gave me a beautiful silver ring that is engraved and says in hebrew "blessed be the name." i love it so much.
2. tonight mel and i went to fred myer to grab a few items and it was dark and rainy and just kind of gross. so i'm roaring through the lot trying to find the closest parking spot. visibility was bad but i spotted a pretty good one and tried to finagle my way in. it turned out to be one that was close to the cart return and i wasn't sure if i could park there... so i maneuvered my way back out (a bit annoyed that my plan for that good spot had been thwarted) and i was ready for a long cruise about the lot in search of a spot. to my surprise and glee, there was a better spot just down the lot from me. i was so excited that we had kept looking.
random thoughts? yes, but i still can't help but think of them. there are others too but i don't want to bore everyone to death.
my thoughts on the ring story:
-i can't help but think that the Lord allows us to lose (or he blatantly takes away) things from our lives to prepare us for much better and greater things.
my thoughts on the parking space story
-sometimes i think i give up to easily and just kind of settle... this is not okay. i don't ever want to settle for anything less than Gods best in my life. sometimes a longer search and a longer wait is more rewarding. btw, for all who think i'm ready for marriage, THIS IS NOT A REFERENCE TO MARRIAGE OR A FUTURE MATE IN ANY WAY!!
also, totally unrelated. i despise ivory soap.

awkward dilemma

2007-12-31T23:45:00.000-08:00

so, i was in an awkward predicament today.
i went to the car wash by jack in the box after i finally left urraco today. first off, i get a little flustered going to the car wash by myself. its just kind of awkward. they just stare in the car and i always find myself trying to look busy. bah, anyway, i was trying to be all poised and non-awkward about it.
sooo, mel calls me when i'm in line. this was good i thought, things would be less awkward if i was doing something instead of merely staring back at them through the windshield. so i roll down the window, fling over 7 dollars (a 5 and two 1's) for the silver wash. so the guy comes back to the window a second later and hands in 3 dollar bills and tells me to roll up my window. me, in the midst of a weird moment anyway, trying to talk to mel, him, and roll up my window just kind of stared at the money. i was trying to figure out if he had been mixed up about the money. i quickly went through the scenarios thinking perhaps i'd accidentally given him a 10 and two 1's but even that didn't make sense. i still wouldn't have gotten 3 dollars back. it didn't make sense. nothing did!!
at this point, i had to consider the fact that he did it intentionally, you know, like the flirty waiters that give you free food. well, i concluded that was what this was all about and i didn't want to make things ever more awkward by rolling down my window in the midst of the wash and shout that he'd given me too much money.
so, i did nothing. then i felt a little bad. what if he really was just confused and i just knowingly drove off with the money.
guess i'm gonna ring in the new year by being a thief. but seriously, what should i have done?? what would YOU have done??

oh these jumbled thoughts of mine

2007-12-24T19:07:00.000-08:00

i just got my last gift wrapped and put it under the tree. yay. please christmas just come and be done with. i love christmas (well, i love jesus and the purpose of christmas) but sometimes i hate everything else about it. this year especially. we just put our tree up.. two days ago. its not even a nice one, its just one my dad cut down from the hill behind our house. up until last night we didn't have any decorations in the house. this has just been a crappy holiday season for my family and i don't think that any of us were ready for it to be here so soon.
anyway, all this to say:
1: merry christmas
2: i got my shopping done early this year (everything is wrapped and under the tree before christmas morning.) new record!!
3: walmart was possibly the most frantic sight i've ever encountered.
4: God is on the move. i feel him, even in the midst of my stupid attidude and bah-humbug-ishness this season, jesus will never give up on me. he isn't phased by my jerkiness and short temper. he still loves me and calls me his own. :)
5: i am excited about christmas dinner tomorrow! bring on the yummy food!
6: also, the lakers play the suns tomorrow. go lakers!!

the worst version of myself

2007-12-14T14:37:00.000-08:00

seriously, i feel like i am the worst version of myself. life has really been hard this last week for my family but that is no excuse for me being a jerk to pretty much everyone that is unfortunate enough to cross paths with me.
so to all those who have been victim to my jerkiness and short temperedness and overall just... weirdness, i'm sorry.
to all those who have been praying for me and for my family, thank you. please continue to pray. this is one of the hardest losses that we have ever had to deal with. we're leaving tonight and driving to ventura. the service is on monday. please pray for matt and for amanda. this was supposed to be the biggest blessing of their lives and it turned into the greatest test of faith. only god knows why little baby caleb died in his mothers womb just weeks before his due date. only god knows the good that will come from this. we struggle to understand it and admit to ourselves that we probably can never understand.

"you give and take away, you give and take away. my heart will choose to say, lord blessed by your name"

highlight of my dismal week

2007-12-13T06:29:00.000-08:00

i watched the bourne ultimatum last night with my family. i had never seen it before which was just a sin. theres no other way to say it. i love that series! i think i can die happy now.
fyi, i would marry jason bourne/david webb if he asked me. i know its just a movie but the guy is so smart. and i would always feel safe. haha, i could maybe finally go out without feeling like i need my pepper spray :)

another 'w'

2007-12-09T16:32:00.000-08:00

finally an impressive victory.
seahawks are looking good at the right time.
makes me very happy :)

the good ol' days

2007-12-04T21:10:00.000-08:00

this isn't going to be much of a blog. i don't really remember how to blog.. or type.. or do much at all besides handwashing dishes using water that i heated up on the woodstove!
some highlights of my 3-4ish days without power!!
-lots of sleep. most nights i was in bed by 9pm simply because there wasn't anything to do!!
-i got very good at the game of solitaire.. no, not on the computer. with real cards.
-i was once again impressed with the fact that i can go days without washing my hair and it looks fine (although, with no power, its hard to see!!) so maybe it didn't look too fine!
- i got more organized. i laid things out before it got dark to makes things easier to find.
-i made my bed every morning!!
-i drank lots of hot tea (there wasn't much else to drink!)
-i now have a deeper appreciation for hot chocolate
-i got to spend quality time with my dad and brother (which hasn't happened in months or years)
-i was the "domestic" one since mom was still in ca. i "cooked" and cleaned for the boys. bah!
-i realized how little there is to do with no internet and no tv.
-which in turn made me angry at how much time i devote to the above mentioned things.
-i read a lot. just me and a book. it was fun and i've missed it.
-getting in the habit of using a paper towel instead of a plate whenever possible simply to avoid using dishes that i would have to later wash.
-i finally came to realize that my dad seriously could make it in the wilderness armed only with his coon-skinned cap and a pocket knife (and clothes of course)... he loves it when the power goes out. i can tell. he loves the challenge and loves that we have woodheat and have running water. he loves going out and checking out the neighborhood (borrowing a tractor and clearing the mudslide off the road too if he has a spare minute) pretty much he is hilarious and i sometimes forget.
-so, it may take me a while to get back into this whole electricity, hot water, and heaven forbid, work!! when the roads get cleared. i kind think part of me could have made it back in the olden days as well.
-braided pig-tales were a necessity for me and i felt very much like i belonged on "little house on the prarie"!! :)

driving in the snow...

2007-12-01T17:28:00.000-08:00

okay.
its that time of year again. no, i'm not talking about christmas per say, i'm talking about bad weather and the never ending warnings from parents about driving carefully and watching for ice. first of all, i'm 23 years old and have been driving for 8 years. i've driven on ice, snow and slush many times now without an accident. i think i deserve a little credit. which brings me to today.....
pretty much we have so far over 4 inches of snow on the ground. my dad had brought my mom to the airport this morning and got home around 1pm which was shortly after the snow had begun to stick. he proceeds to give me a rundown of all the accidents he saw and all the cars that were off the road. he advises me not to go to work.
well, i was undeterred. now i realize i should have listened to him. first warning that i should have just stayed home was the fact that i fell, not once, but TWICE just trying to get down our thousand stairs and to my car. it took me about 5 minutes to try to get the snow off my car enough to drive. i maneuvered successfully down my driveway and out to the highway. thats when things got tricky.
without going into too many details lets just say i got less than half a mile before i spun out of control and ended up blocking both lanes.. yeah, me, the driving pro who has 8 years of experience. the real kicker was the fact that i had only been in 2nd gear and i'm guessing my speed at the point of the spin was somewhere around 15 mph.
so there i sit, in middle of the road, tires spinning wildly as i try to get back to going the right way. fyi, i had not given up. i was not even trying to go home yet. i am stupid. i was still convinced that i could make it into work... if only i could get my car facing towards shelton i would be fine i thought.
a flurry of cars somehow are getting past me.. not sure how they weren't spinning out (shaqs). so i just sat there. spinning my tires being a helpless damsel in distress. i hate that feeling. i spy a teal colored truck stop and a door open. a youngish looking guy comes jogging over and asks me if i need help. duh. actually, i was very grateful for his help. he gets behind my car and starts pushing.. and nothing happened. i could not get any traction. none. but i keep trying (what else can i do???) finally i get out and tell him i don't think its working and ask if he'd care to try. this is a trend for me, i always make someone else for responsible for something that is my fault. i did the exact same thing when i ran out of gas at a busy intersection in olympia... anyway.
so he gets in and keeps killing it. in all fairness, my car is very temperamental and certainly not the easiest stick to drive. another good samaritan comes over and helps me push the car out (facing towards town) i thank them both and head on my merry way still determined to get to work.
well, i get maybe 50 yards and start heading up a slight incline when you guessed it, my car lost all traction. i had the stupid car in 1st gear and wasn't getting anywhere. there i am, blocking the southbound lane of highway 101 for the second time that day. people are passing me in the other lane honking at the dumb blonde in the bmw unable to get up the hill.. i look in my rearview mirror and spy the same teal truck just stopped behind me. (this guy seriously was my hero). he comes up to my window and suggests that i turn around and go home. and since there was no room right where i happened to be stalled, he proceeds to push my car (uphill!!!) until we find a place to turn it around. i have never met such a kind stranger :)
i made it home just fine (luckily it was all mostly downhill) and my dad didn't even rub it in my face too much (he could have).....
so, to sum it up, i am stupid. how stubborn can i be?? how did i not realize sooner that i was never going to make it. i could have seriously hurt my car/and or myself today. i'm so thankful i didn't. my dad is right more often then i give him credit for. i need to have studded tires put on mel.
there really are modern day heros. so mr. teal truck, thank you for your help today. i'm pretty sure that without you, i would still be spinning my tires blocking both lanes and stupidly refusing to give up. so thank you.

i'm boycotting mexican cuisine

2007-11-26T20:08:00.001-08:00

i have decided that i will never go to a mexican restaurant again.
first bad experience was up in seattle a couple weeks ago. the waiter was mean and scared the crap out of us and didn't seem to understand a word that we said. my order was wrong and he says to my face that i don't know how to order and that i said "taquitos" instead of fajitas... basically i tried to forget about my anger at that jerk of a man.
which brings me to tonight. we go to this authentic mexican place where, i once again, order fajitas. the order was heard and interpreted correctly (i now am wishing they'd messed it up though!!) out comes the spicest/hottest thing i have ever put in my mouth. my eyes burned, tears were streaming down my face, my lips felt like they were on fire. it was quite the sight i'm sure!! so, liisa (arizona native for 10+ years and quite accustomed to spicy/hot food) takes a bite and has very much the same reaction. i was very glad i had a witness, someone else who could verify the hotness of the food.
it was crazy. we decided they were so busy that they had mixed up some of the peppers and accidentally put them on my plate. the waiter (quite the macker) was very nice and offered me free food and free gift certificates for my trouble. it was nice to finally have a waiter who cared.
anyway, all is right with the world now. we went out to ice cream, mostly for my sake i suspect to calm the raging burning in my throat, mouth and lips.
so yeah, don't ask me to go to mexican food. i will refuse.
side note, to anyone who doesn't know, don't drink water greedily to stop that horrid burning. it doesn't help!
and more good news, i macked a free mt dew out of the waiter :)

my family, my life

2007-11-24T14:48:00.000-08:00

i love sun in november.
i love playing card games with my insane family.
i love the way that we all have the same crazy sense of humor and the way the in-laws just stare....
i love that we are a knee-slapping family when something really amuses us.
i love that we all like country music and that we turn it up loud in the rental van.
i love leftover turkey.
i love bandit, belle-belle, and daisy (liisa and nates dogs)
i love not having to set an alarm.
i love that my voice is back (i do not recommend laryngitis to anyone!!)
i love garth brooks' new song "more than a memory" so sad but so good.
i love spending time with liisa and seeing how similar i am to all my sisters.
i love the way my mom and dad just watch us with that oh so familiar proud expression on their faces.
i love that we can talk about politics, religion and just about anything else under the sun.
i love my family. :)

-the only thing i'm not totally content about right now is the fact that i have no room, not even a bed. i have been residing on the couch in the family room. which means, i wake up with everyone sitting around me, on me, or near me laughing about how grumpy i am in the morning or how dumb my hair looks when its sticking straight up.
-also not content about the way that both my brother-in-laws both seem to be dedicated to marrying me off. seriously guys? just stop..
overall, life is good :)

thanksgiving comes but once a year... now its here...

2007-11-22T09:41:00.000-08:00

i love thanksgiving. it really is the best holiday. i love waking up and smelling the turkey in the oven. i love all the good food. everywhere, all day. we have pancakes and bacon for breakfast. soon after the girls go into the kitchen and start preparing snack trays with chips, crackers, cheese, meat, soda's, pretty much everything i love. the guys munch on these snacks while watching whatever sport happens to be on tv.
note, i join the guys in front of the television. my lack of expertise in the kitchen paired with my great love for sports has excused me from ever being called upon to help with anything that has to do with food on thanksgiving.
i just love this day. its so good to be here close to family and see everyone. well, we're missing mel, michelle, damien and calvin... but still, we've got everyone else together, and anyone who knows my family knows there are a lot of us anyway so its feels like a full house even with a few missing.
its just so easy to get disgruntled with life and grow discontent with circumstances and whatever is going badly in life and just focus on that, but today is such a great reminder be thankful. whether you want to or not, you are forced into the grateful spirit. i love it. i love my family. i love my brothers-in-law and my sister-in-law. i love the warm weather and taking walks with my sister liisa after dinner with the dogs. its just so different here and i'm loving it. i am also creepily aware that mark and i are pretty much the same person. the more i see him and spend time with him, the more i realize we have very similar mannerisms. and mark, being the computer genius that he is, most likely is monitoring this comment from across the room on his laptop....
well, happy thanksgiving to all! hope everyone is enjoying their crazy and funky traditions as much as i am this year. :)

politics to flossing.

2007-11-16T21:31:00.000-08:00

what i've been up to-
-visiting my sis in virginia and my nephew :)
-trying not to get sick
-watching lakers games whenever i can (did anyone else see the one tonight??) amazing!
-laundry
-finally understanding that a headache can seriously do a lot to ruin your day (2 days in a row now)
-trying to figure out what candidates i like for 08
-trying to convince susanne that hillary might be the antichrist. (thanks for the backup beck :)
-getting ready for thanksgiving
-getting excited about seeing family and friends.

what i haven't been up to-
-earning any money. paychecks just suck when you take time off. end of story
-writing blogs.
-reading blogs. man, there were a lot of good ones to catch up on!
-keeping up on news, current events, etc. and realizing i don't know much about how i stand on quite a few things. this bothered me.
-flossing. i haven't flossed in weeks. haha, just thought i'd throw that one in there.

they're after me

2007-10-30T06:06:00.000-07:00

i'm not really sure if there is a better feeling in the world than worming/squirming, weaseling, whatever you want to call it of a much deserved ticket. its a thrill, a skill, even a sport i'd say.
i have never known greater feeling of victory or triumph.
and fyi, i have not stooped to crying yet... but i think i'd do it though if i felt it would be beneficial. :)

just pray

2007-10-23T06:03:00.000-07:00

my very wise sister (mother of a 9 month old) was recently was telling me of the joys/trials of being a new mom. one thing in particular that she told me stuck in my mind, not necessarily because it applies to me, but just the premise of it.
she told me that every time that her baby wakes up crying in the night, or is just crying because he's fussy, she uses that as a reminder to pray. i thought, what a good idea, to take a potentially bitter and angry moment, and turn it into prayer time. i was inspired and so proud to call her my sis when i heard this.
i've decided to try to apply this very concept to my own life. obviously i have no squawking baby in the next room waking me up numerous times a night, but i have plenty of my own patience testing moments. a few i thought of just this morning.
-when i'm following a slow car into work that is making my late, i'll use that time to pray
-if i'm feeling bitter about being the first living soul awake most mornings to open the shop, i'll use my quiet morning time before the sun rises in prayer.
-when i see parents yelling/screaming at their kids in the stores, in the past i just get ticked off and think "you have no right to be a parent", why don't i instead pray for that little family?
-when i can't sleep at night.
-when i get angry at the seemingly unending list of non-favorite customers at urraco.
-i tend to have a judgmental nature to me, instead of judging, i'll pray.

these are just a few that i thought of this morning when i was driving to work. i know my goals are high, but why even set goals if they aren't high? i just find that it's so easy to praise God and to pray when things are good, when life is full and joy is abounding. its harder to pray when things just kinda suck. when life feels mundane. when things are annoying. when people are annoying. when we are annoyed by ourselves. at least this is true in my life.
alrighty, over and out!

today my world slipped away..

2007-10-20T22:12:00.000-07:00

so.. at work today i was examining the wrapper of a tootsie pop trying to locate the indian with the bow and star... as i was hit with a wave of childhood memories, i wondered aloud why agian we search for the indian. leah (rothrock) and i then compared childhood knowledge on the topic and concluded that if there was an indian on the wrapper, you could trade it in for a free tootsie pop.
intrigued by this new (but old information) i hopped onto google and was stunned to read the following.

"Tootsie Roll Pops traditionally were wrapped in paper with icons and symbols, including but not limited to, an American Indian with a bow and arrow aimed at a star. From soon after the introduction of Tootsie Pops from 1931 through the present day (currently generating about 150 letters a week), a rumor has circulated that a wrapper containing the American Indian icon shooting a star could be traded-in for a free Tootsie Roll Pop.

According to Tootsie Roll Industries and web site Snopes.com [2], this rumor is not true. However, according to Snopes.com [3], individual merchants have chosen to honor the wrapper legend over the years, allowing people to "win" a free pop."

i felt pretty much everything that i knew in life slip away. haha, ok, thats going too far, but really, this is huge! finding out something of this magnitude is not what i thought at all really threw me off. what else am i completely wrong about? or just not informed about?

anyway, i felt the rest of the world needed to be enlightened. so, hope you deal with this information better than i did.

*source http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tootsie_Pop

sea-slugs

2007-10-14T20:58:00.000-07:00

hmmm...
will they ever win again?
[the seahawks]
i doubt it.
i really need to stop wasting my sundays watching them lose.
back a few years ago when they truly sucked, my dad took to calling them the sea-slugs. i don't know why exactly, i guess it just sounds insulting. i might start calling them that.

ahhh. weekends.

2007-10-14T11:22:00.000-07:00

i'm such a homebody. i love staying home and doing nothing on weekends. stay up late. sleep in late. get up and do nothing. lay back down in bed to watch any sport on tv. what a life.
i can't wait to retire.

shop 'til you drop

2007-10-09T20:51:00.000-07:00

so, every 6-12 months, i go on a random shopping spree and buy lots of things. i did it today. i went in pretty much solely (i claimed) for some shoes at famous footwear. well, i came home with a little more than that! its good though. i needed to buy some things and there were tons of good deals going on. i found some amazing sheets at bed bath and beyond for only 9.99! i was excited.
it was a good day. i stayed hydrated so i didn't get my usual "shopping feeling" that tends to strike about 1o minutes into my big day. i really am not a fan of shopping in general and i think sometimes i just kinda psych myself out. today though, i think i knew it was a big day for me so i took measures to make sure i'd be able to make it more than 2o minutes!
something that kinda struck me as odd today. everyone called me "ma'am" in the stores. how old do i look?? it just kind of threw me off. i guess there really not very many terms that you can call women (old or young for that matter) but even so, i felt about 10,000 years old at times. partly because of being called ma 'am, but also partly because i so do not understand/appreciate many of the current styles that seem to be "in style." its just a lot of awkward stuff that looks stupid. i probably looked like an old lady the way i suspiciously scrutinized everything and usually put things back on the rack if they were not on sale.
so anyway... go forth and shop.

my darling little nephew.

2007-10-04T19:33:00.001-07:00

you know. i like kids. i really truly do. i think there are a lot of brats out there that give kids a bad name in my opinion. there are however, several small people that i do enjoy seeing. my nephew calvin is at the top of the list. :) calvin is almost 9 months old and is just darling. i mean, i know everyone thinks that their kid is the best/cutest/smartest etc.. haha, even at 9 months parents make claims like these! anyhow though, calvin is pretty much one of the cutest little guys i've ever seen.
he smiles constantly. laughs heartily at my dumb faces (he doesn't understand my jokes yet but i'm giving him time). i think my favorite thing that i discovered today is when i was feeding him a bottle, he placed his tiny little fingers on top of my hand and grasped it tightly. when i attempted to pull it away, he held on with a superman like strength. i have come to very much enjoy the way that he just kind of cuddles his warm little body all close and snuggly when you hold him. also, he has just recently started to crawl and is quite clumsy at it which makes it all the more endearing.
in answer to anyone concerned about me, no, i have not gone soft. i am not just hanging around waiting to get married and have kids so that i can write this kind of thing about my own children (ahhhh!! what a thought!!) instead of my precious little nephew. i simply was struck by his sweet and trusting nature and his naive and childlike approach to the world. adults need to be more like kids and thats all there is to it. anyways, here he is :)

i sleep too much

2007-10-03T14:25:00.000-07:00

i slept 17 hours yesterday.
background:
i opened monday morning at 5:30. i'd gotten about 4 hours of sleep the night before. my sister michelle flew in that night with her son calvin so we were naturally up late chatting until after midnight. i also opened tuesday morning so another 4:30am wakeup call after getting very little sleep. all this leads up to yesterday when i got off work at 10:30 am. michelle wanted to make a run up to walmart to pick up a few things. i was already exhausted and feeling somewhat on the feverish side. so to walmart we go. yeah, bad idea. i almost collapsed in several of the aisles before heading out to sit down in my car.
we arrive home around 1pm. i go directly to bed. do not pass go, do not collect 200. and i sleep all day and all night. i didn't wake up until 4:30am this morning. insanity. i did not know that i was capable of sleeping so long at one time. it seemed to have worked though as my fever/chills were pretty much gone this morning and i was able to work with just a sore throat ailing me. could have been much worse.
anyway, i thought that the sheer amount of sleep i got last night was blogworthy, hence the blog i think one of the days i'm going to be inspired to write a blog that has nothing to do with how wretched i feel physically. until that day.... thank you and goodnight

time for a change?

2007-09-29T10:49:00.000-07:00

i noticed an odd little fact about myself today.
i think i am in denial of the fact that time passes by.. i know it sounds dumb (and in reality, it is kinda dumb). i woke up this morning and for the first time noted that my calender is still in the month of april. thinking maybe it was a fluke, i glanced over at my other calender and saw that it was a bit more respectable but that it was still living back in the month of june.
whats with me? no wonder i can never seem to make my cell phone payments on time. or my car insurance. or my credit card payment. i also decided that if i did not own a cell phone that displays the month and day every time it is opened, i would probably not even be able to tell you what month we are in.
sad but true. its time for a change i decided but i don't want to rush anything... so i flipped one of my calenders forward to july and the other one up to august. i don't want to rush things after all.... its a good thing i noticed this now or else i'm afraid that christmas would have just come and gone without me.

i hate being a girl!

2007-09-26T22:27:00.000-07:00

yeah, so the title may give you an idea about this blog, don't worry, i won't get too detailed but can i just say that for the first time in my life, i called in to work because of cramps. i'm not one to brag (too much) but i'm typically a tough person, if something hurts, i pretend it doesn't. i have not once in my life gone to the doctor (excluding the broken arm incident) . we were raised tough in my family. if you're sick, sweat it out, and you'll get better soon. if we had a sore throat that we suspected was strep throat, mom told us to wait a week and if it wasn't better she'd bring us in. i've muddled though my whole childhood and into adulthood with this mentality; when i'm sick, leave me alone. i don't want more blankets, i don't want juice, i don't want anything. i just want to be left alone.
anyway, this rant got off the topic but thats ok. all i really want to say is that i'm so sorry for girls that have these kind of cramps every month. i would die. the pain was so intense i couldn't stand or walk. i keep breaking into a cold sweat and my hands shook so badly i could barely dial the phone.
i'm just ticked off that this prevented me from working today. it made me feel like the biggest wimp on the face of the planet. very un-marshall-like.
fyi, the severity and intensity of the cramps had pretty much subsided by 5 pm so i decided to go to biblestudy tonight and well, i kinda wish i hadn't. my car overheated and broke down in the calvary parking lot. yeah, like my day hadn't sucked enough already..
thank goodness tomorrow is another day!!

random thoughts in my head

2007-09-24T21:39:00.000-07:00

i think i'm going to attempt to go to bed earlier these days. i'm going to be opening some mornings (5:30am) so out of my house by 5am, so awake by... 4:55 am. :) haha, but seriously, i have known for some time that i needed to establish some healthier sleeping habits, and i think now is the time. fyi, the reason this blog is in existence is because i tried (and failed) to go to bed at 9.. i am still very much awake and my mind is racing with thoughts.
1. i am excited to be getting off work at 10:30 am. :)
2. i am excited that shawna is working next door and will be gracing us with her presence on a daily basis :)
3. i'm excited about my biblestudies that i am a part of. i have one at my church and one at my friend ingrids house. and they both look to be amazing studies and i'm excited to get to know more girls/ladies/whatever you want to call mid-twentiesish girls my age in shelton.
4. i have been trying to memorize a verse and i have been meditating on it the past day and will continue to mediate on it.

Matthew 11:29-30
"Come to Me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. for My yoke is easy, and My burden is light."

this is just such an encouraging verse for me at this time in my life. so often i feel so tired, so dragged down by the things of this world, so beaten. oh how i love to find rest for my soul in Him. it is so sweet to trust in Jesus.
5. i think thats all i have to say for now.
6. i forgot, i am soooo excited for season 4 of the office to start!
ok thats it. night!

what? what?

2007-09-17T21:59:00.000-07:00

i hate it when someone says something, and i can't hear so i say what. so they repeat it at exactly the same volume. i have bad hearing, its a known fact. i just cannot hear exceptionally well, so i say what a lot. and i am getting really fed up with it. it happens so much at work i can't even say. usually when something noisy is going on, either they have a loud car, the blenders are... blending.. or milk is steaming, it doesn't even matter. it just happens. i say what, and they repeat it the same way.
hint, when i say what, that means i couldn't hear you. so, it would be most helpful if you raised your voice just a touch. i don't mean yelling, that usually isn't necessary, just a bit louder. isn't that common sense? i would have thought so. i don't anymore.
i've also made a rule for myself. i will not say what a 3rd time. it is embarrassing, awkward, and typically whatever it is that i can't hear is not worth the effort of asking 3 times. if i still can't hear you after the second time asking, i'll just smile and nod my head. don't be fooled. i still haven't heard you.

i feel that i should say that in an emergency situation, where a life was at stake for instance, i would break my rule. i have also been known to break it if i feel that the correctness of a drink is at stake.

welcome to my life

2007-09-15T16:45:00.001-07:00

haha, the free hot dog give-away is over. can i just say chaos?? actually it wasn't really too bad. it just felt super busy because we were doing our normal duties, making drinks, etc, and also filling up ketchup and mustard bottles on the side and brewing about 100 gallons of drip coffee for faithful customers such as roy. you know though, life is too short to get ticked off about things. it was a very amusing day to me. i got to work with leah, whom i feel like i haven't seen in years, so that was really fun. and it was just a kind of fun day in general. i got off at 3:30 so i wasn't able to be there for the music on the patio featuring dan tripplett band. i hear that they are great. :) haha
anyway though, this was my day. i'm glad to be home now. i'm just watching flip that house with my brother mike. i need to get caught up on laundry but i somehow just can't start it. i have been avoiding it almost all summer. soon i will run out of clean clothes and be forced to take some action. also, just a side note, but i am in a bit of a frazzle about the fact that becky and i seem to have shared the same exact childhood. we've seen almost all the same movies, tv shows, and seem to have memorized all of the same quotes too. i have never met someone who has seen the same movies as me. i'm glad though. it makes her feel almost like family... haha!!
anyway, this was pretty much a waste of time to write, and a waste of your time to read. i just felt like writing a blog and i didn't want the fact that i had nothing to blog about to stop me :)

seriously??

2007-09-10T00:18:00.000-07:00

ok, after all the drama going on over on becky's blog, i feel that something needs to be said (although i feel that becky covered the situation more than adequately) NO ONE HAS TO READ THESE POSTS. seriously, its pretty much an online journal, a diary, a place to write out what you're thinking, what you're feeling, and yeah, some of it may just be some raw emotions that you happen to be feeling that you happen to feel like writing out. seriously though, i am not a fan of the "anonymous" readers/commenter's in the first place, especially when they are making such bold reprimands. i mean, if you read it, and have something to say about it, let us know who you are! it's kinda of a bit cowardly to not state your name at the least.
ok, i am super fired up about this and am going to attempt to settle down.

got schrempf?

2007-09-07T19:18:00.000-07:00

detlef schrempf?
seriously, who really remembers him besides bam-bam??!! haha

i've got peace like a river....

2007-09-05T19:50:00.000-07:00

fyi, this will be a personal post...
so the past few days, well, since saturday night i think it was, i have been praying that the lord will give me a desire to know him more. i often feel so lukewarm in my spiritual walk, downright weak at times. i more often then not simply "don't have time" to read my bible daily. i somehow find myself having too much on my mind to pray. i somehow had been neglecting the single most important thing in my life- and i was seeming to be okay with it.
since saturday, i have found myself thirsting for God, desiring him and his word. this is so exciting for me after finding myself in a place where i felt like i was just going through the motions. i get excited to come home and read my bible. i find myself praying constantly. i feel.... calmness and contentment, even though no circumstances in my life have changed. God is changing me. i feel him melting my heart. and i'm so happy about it.
this little part of a song has been stuck in my head all day and it's become my prayer...
"here am i.. all of me.. take my life.. it's all for thee"

the small things in life

2007-08-29T21:55:00.000-07:00

some things i'm excited about...
1. the office season 3 coming out on dvd!!! (sept 4th)
2. the office season 4 season opener on sept 27th! yay!
3. yoplait yogurt was only 50 cents at fred myer.
4. i felt the urge to buy some "all natural" bagels as well.
5. soup was also on sale
6. i am turning into my mom

hmm, not sure if i'm excited about that last point. anyway, yeah, i guess i have a simple life to be so excited about this things.
a side note, i have decided to faithfully take my vitamins and drink more water.

home again..

2007-08-27T13:40:00.001-07:00

no matter how many times i leave. no matter where i go. coming home is always the same. funny how that happens.
the roadtrip was fun. bittersweet but good. saying goodbye to mel was kind of hard (4 months is a long time!!) but it was good. we both know she's where she supposed to be.
the thrill of the open road kinda wears off after the 3rd day of driving, but we managed to remain pretty optimistic i think. we are pretty much pro's when it comes to reading maps, calculating distances, times, miles, etc... mel and i have done that trip more times than i can even count, and this was the 3rd time (well, 2nd) depends on how you count, that we've done it with kristen and leah. fun times on the road!
i am a fan of roadtrips and intend to take them until i die.

california, here we come!

2007-08-20T22:27:00.000-07:00

off we go in a mere few hours! the excitement is taking over. i love roadtripping. i love chico. i love my friends. i am just pretty much in love with life right now. i hope that i have emerged from my "quarter life crisis" funk that seems to have swallowed me up lately. i just want to be content in all things. church was really good this week. pastor marlon was preaching about worry and how our hearts cannot hold both worry and worship. i have decided i would much rather live a life of worship then a life of worry. he talked about most of the worry in our lives is about stuff that will never happen. another huge portion of worry was invested into things have already happened (this was a convicting point for me as i find that i tend to feel super guilty and beat myself up about things) i am learning to just let go of what is behind me. anyway though, the point of the sermon was that a tiny percent (like 7%) of all worry is about things that we actually have control over and thins that are considered "legitimate worries." i was excited about this sermon (obviously)
oh, and just a side note, the night at the naz was amazing! i'm so proud of sue for doing that. we need more nights of worship here in shelton. there is a thirst for it.

cruel summer

2007-08-19T02:36:00.000-07:00

this has been the most random summer of my existence. don't get me wrong, it hasn't been terrible. it hasn't really been too spectacular either though. i spent most of my time visiting my sisters in arizona, going away for random weekends to weddings and other miscellaneous events. trekking off to minnesota/missouri/michagin for family reunions. yeah, no one could remember what state it was! and while i enjoyed (somewhat) most of these little excursions, i feel like the summer just kind of slipped by without me. i have worked very little this summer (which is actually kind of nice considering i seriously thought i might die after last quarter). but on the other hand, i have very little green stuff to showing up in my savings account.
i'm trying hard to not feel like i wasted my summer. i know i didn't. i had fun. saw family. bopped around. i'm not really sure where this discontentment is creeping in from. i think i know that summer (as i know it) is almost gone. part of me is starting to panic. another school year is starting. a new schedule. new classes. a new everything. yet somehow everything always stays the same.
i don't know if this makes any sense. most likely it doesn't but i had to get it out.
one final thought:
mel, kristen, leah and i are leaving on tuesday morning to roadtrip down to Masters college (near Los Angeles Ca). i'm thinking of it as a final hurrah for summer (like i haven't been gone enough already!) but all in all, i'm pretty excited about it. roadtripping with best buds is hard to beat. i'm excited to see one last glimpse of sun. just another carefree summer day. ok, more like 6 of them. :) oh, and becky, i'm soooooo thankful that you "pulled through" for us!! you really are a miracle. :) haha, awkward but true. urraco girls are the best!
anyway, see y'all around... or not... i'll most likely be off somewhere doing something that isn't here.

the wait is almost over!

2007-08-15T19:17:00.000-07:00

the countdown is nearly over!! on saturday i will taste the perfect sweetness of an ice cold mountain dew for the first time in 40 days. i can't even wait. i'm really not sure what to expect. will the "fast" make me want to drink more than before?? or will my body be so used to not drinking it that i will not appreciate it anymore? i'm not even sure what i want to happen. i'm just so glad that it's over and i'm so glad to know that i can do it.
i think i'll wait a week or so then do another fast. not sure yet what to give up. it might be something like my myspace.. give that up for 40 days. or maybe chocolate....
i decided though, it's important to give things up, but it even more important to substitute it with something else. when i gave up my soda, i had a lot of water and teas instead. this was definately beneficial to my health. if i give up my myspace i need to make sure i spend that time doing something else like devotion time or praying.
anyway, just had to rant and rave about that for a minute.
saturday here we come!!!

don't go

2007-08-14T13:56:00.000-07:00

haha, kristen has been trying to leave the house for hours to head back into shelton but i have found the key to making her stick around.. put another disc of friends on! yup, direct quote from kristen when the last episode began "i can't leave!"
so.. having said that, i just need to say that there is really no better way to spend the day then lounging around in bed and watching tv. this is a life. i never want to grow up. too bad i have :(

things to come

2007-08-13T11:32:00.000-07:00

yes, this is my blog. this first post will undoubtedly be an awkward trial run. i don't want to try too hard to be funny. stick around though, the best is yet to come. :)
not really sure how i feel about this whole world of blogging. i mean, i like it. i really do or i wouldn't have started one. i just feel unsure about my boundaries. i have a lot of thoughts. i feel a lot of things. i have never really been much of a keeping a journal/diary kind of girl. most of my deepest thoughts and feelings i keep to myself, with the exception of sharing with my close friends. i have no intention of posting all that on here and having complete strangers reading it. at the same time, i don't want all the posts to be about absolutely nothing (as this one is turning out to be). guess i'll just have to find a balance. stick around if you want to. just don't expect greatness. you might be disappointed.

as a side note, i feel the need to declare how much i loved the movie "No reservations." if you haven't seen it, see it. so amazingly good. i loved it so much. dr. kristen suggested it was because i am similar to the main character in personality. i suppose that could be true. anyway, go see it. you won't be sorry.